Life as a new divorcee

It's the stupid things that you don't think about that get you. For me it's the stuff my ex did and never grumbled about. It was almost as if he wanted me helpless in those areas. He gladly handled house and car repairs, but never mowed the lawn. Sigh.
The lawn is going to kill me to mow. I have and know how, which is probably why he never did it, but he never let me do it either. I can't find my cat...
The house repairs are another story all together. I can change a light bulb. I can plug stuff into the wall. But the rest...
Yesterday I plunged my first toilet. It was disgusting. And the slurpy noise the plunger made was vile. It was almost worth hiring someone to do it. Almost. I managed. It wasn't a whole lot of fun but I got through it.
Now the car is another matter. I can drive, I can put gas in it. That's it. So, when I noticed the little inspection sticker was out of date I called the mechanic. I was so proud of myself! I'd handled a potentially huge issue. I even arranged for a ride to and from since the mechanic said it would take a couple of hours before he could get to it.
He just called, the mechanic, the registration is expired.
I guess I'm not doing such a great job after all.

The Trouble With Being Single

This is my first post, but not my first divorce. I'm going to really try not to whine, but wow! The last time I was single was in 1994, and I hated every second. I spent the day at a job I hated and the nights alone in my tiny apartment.
It isn't any better this time.
I imagined that the divorce would magically create peace and harmony in my life. The divorce fairy would swoop down, wave her wand and Poof!! I'd be happy.
Right.
If there is a divorce fairy she has a messed up sense of humor.
First, the divorce fairy forgot to take my husband, er..ex husband, with her. She left him to annoy me every Saturday when he picks up his son. She should have shown some consideration, right? Take him permanently out of the picture, to Vegas or Sheboygan. But, no! He plunks his skinny rump on my old sofa and watches the TV I pay for and eats my Cheetos!
How is that fair?
When does the fun start? The dating hot men? The oodles of cash raining in from child support?
The reality of it is it sucks nearly as bad as being married to the creep to begin with. I'm stuck affording new shoes and Cheetos and he's off on his own.
Now to be fair I'm sure men don't have it any easier. They are humans too, except my ex, he's special. I'm betting they are lonely too, and worried about the kids they had to leave behind.
I never imagined that I would end up divorced a second time. I was not ready. My job isn't enough for the three of us. My house isn't paid for. The dog doesn't even like me!
So, where is that divorce fairy? I have some questions for her.